Holistic Medicine and the Western Medical Tradition

America: The Land Of The Freely Medicated
DOCTOR/PHYSICIAN, HOSPITAL, NURSES, PATIENTS, SILLY, USA | HEALTHY | JUNE 21, 2018
(I consider myself very lucky that I have always been healthy. I was never sick often as a kid, and have no chronic ailments as an adult. Call me crazy, but I generally assumed that was the case for most people unless they had a serious accident, or developed a condition, etc. That is, until recently, when I check into the hospital for a minor procedure. Nothing is wrong; this is a procedure having to do with fertility. My mom goes with me the morning of my appointment and is sitting by my bed while I fill out the final pre-surgery forms and get set up with the IV, etc. Over the course of the next half-hour, I have only slightly different versions of the same conversation with every nurse and doctor who comes to check on me

Nurse #1 : *checks my chart* “I see here your only medication is birth control?”

Me: “That’s right.”

Nurse #1 : “No allergies? No other medications?”

Me: “Nope.”

Nurse #1 : “Hmm… Okay.” *leaves*

(Mom and I give each other a look, but don’t think anything else of it. Then the next conversations happen

Nurse #2 : “Are you sure you don’t take any other medications?”

Nurse #3 : “Are you sure you don’t have allergies?”

Doctor #1 : “Wow! No other meds?”

Nurse #4 : “I can’t believe you’re not taking anything else!”

Doctor #2 : “Birth control is the only thing you take?”

Me: *turning to my mom after the last doctor leaves* “Are they being really, really thorough, or do we just live in a very unhealthy area?”

Mom: “When I had surgery last year only two people asked me about the medicines I take. It seems strange to me, too, and you’re so young! What do they expect you to be taking?”

(The procedure goes fine, and soon I’m waking up from the anesthesia.)

Mom: “Hi, honey.”

Nurse #5 : “Hi there, [My Name]! You did great!” *checks my chart* “Are you really only taking birth control, and nothing else?”

Me: *slurred and groggy* “Seriously?! How unhealthy did you expect me to be?!”

Surely Those Kinds Of Sports Are More Downstairs?
COFFEE SHOP, HEALTH & BODY, RUDE & RISQUE, UK, WALES | HEALTHY | JUNE 20, 2018
(A few months ago I had a stupid sport accident resulting in a hurt knee. To fight this, I wear a knee support. It’s a brand professional athletes use; it’s bright blue and covers my leg from mid-calf to mid-thigh. A regular about the same age as my grandfather comes into the café where I work and sees my leg.)

Regular: “What happened to you?”

Me: “Sport trauma.” *it’s the fastest and least descriptive way to say it*

Regular: “Oh, too much upstairs sports, is that right?”

Signing Your Health Away
BAD BEHAVIOR, HOSPITAL, SILLY, SOUTH CAROLINA, USA | HEALTHY | JUNE 20, 2018
(My uncle just had surgery and is telling me about it.)

Uncle: “They told me, because the painkillers mess with your head, to wait 24 hours before making any important decisions or signing any legal documents.”

Me: “Sounds reasonable.”

Uncle: “Then they said, ‘Sign here.'”

(I guess THEIR legal documents don’t count.)

An Underreaction To An Overreaction
BAD BEHAVIOR, HOME, ISRAEL, NON-DIALOGUE, PARENTS/GUARDIANS, PATIENTS | HEALTHY | JUNE 20, 2018
When I was in elementary school, my parents had an obsessive conviction that I must never be allowed to stay home alone during summer vacation, even though they were perfectly fine with letting me stay home alone on a regular basis during the school year.

They always signed me up for every single multi-week summer “camp” available, the ones where kids go or are bused somewhere in the morning and return in the afternoon, like with school.

This happens when I’m about 11. My parents both work, so they’ve signed me up for a camp where kids spend the whole day in a water-park, mostly under the sun non-stop, wearing only swimsuits.

One night before bedtime, Mom plugs some kind of new bug-repelling device she’s just bought into an electric outlet in my bedroom.

When I wake up, I’m covered head to toe in large, swollen, red, and extremely itchy hives. They are absolutely everywhere. I look like a horror movie monster and can’t stop scratching.

Mom examines me, and declares that it must be “just” an allergic response to the bug repellent, and that it is “not a big deal.” I must still go to camp as usual. She doesn’t even try to put any kind of lotion on me or do anything.

I protest having to go anywhere in this condition, as I feel terrible and look frightening.

Mom insists, and derides me for being a baby and whining. She repeats that it’s clearly not a big deal.

It’s clear to me that she just wants to go to work as usual, doesn’t want to be bothered today with taking an ill child to a doctor, and still refuses to let me stay home on my own despite me being too sick to go out. But there’s nothing I can do about it.

Being at the water-park is awful. The chemicals in all the pools and being in the hot sun all irritate and inflame the hives further. As nearly my entire body is exposed in the swimsuit, all the other children look at me with contempt and disgust. Pointing and whispering quickly begins, and I become the target of relentless teasing.

There are very few adults around, and none of them notice or care about anyone being unwell unless they’re clearly dying; most of them are either lifeguards at the pools or people handing out our lunches and snacks, so anything outside that just isn’t their problem.

I spend the entire day absolutely unable to stop scratching everywhere and utterly miserable, while worrying that I have some awful disease — I’ve never had allergic reactions before in my life.

When I finally get home, my mom seems terribly surprised that the hives haven’t gotten any better and that I feel awful.

After some lengthy discussion, it’s decided they’ll actually let me see a doctor. Tomorrow. And Dad will be the one to take off work to take me.

The next day by midday the hives have finally began to partially reduce in size… as I haven’t been sent to a freaking water park today. The doctor I’m taken to says that it is in fact clearly an allergic reaction; most likely to that bug repellent device. And that I clearly should be kept in cool and dry conditions until it goes away: no more sun, chemicals, and dampness. And no more chemical bug repellents in my room.

My parents very begrudgingly allow me to stay home for a day or two after that. I can only remain grateful that this is the only time in my childhood I have had any kind of allergic reaction; otherwise, there’s even odds I’d be dead now.

Thanks so much, Mom, for your entire handling of this situation; your caring and consideration of my health will always stay in my heart.

Please don’t do this to your children.

A Hole Lot Of Guessing
HEALTH & BODY, HOME, PARENTS/GUARDIANS, SLOVENIA | HEALTHY | JUNE 19, 2018
(I am a type-one diabetic and have been for 18 years. I am using an insulin pump, and to give myself correct amount of insulin, I have to calculate the amount of carbohydrates I have eaten. Note that carbohydrates represent a half of the weight of a piece of bread. This happens when I come home from school with hypoglycaemia when I’m 11.)

Dad: “What have you eaten today? Did you give yourself the right amount of insulin?”

Me: “Well, I ate a piece of bread and gave myself insulin for a third of its weight.”

Dad: “Why?!”

Me: “It had large holes!”

Trying In Vein
MEDICAL OFFICE, NURSES, PATIENTS, SILLY, USA, UTAH | HEALTHY | JUNE 19, 2018
(My mom has notoriously small veins, which I have inherited. This happens while I’m getting my blood drawn. My dad is there with me.)

Nurse: *seems to be having trouble finding a vein, tries looking in many different places* “Okay, I think we’re going to end up taking from your hand rather than your arm, because that might be the only place that it will work.”

Dad: “[My Name], do you have really small veins like Mom?”

Nurse: “No, she doesn’t have any veins at all!”

Thanks For Injuring Yourself; Come Back Soon!
FAMILY & KIDS, HOME, MICHIGAN, PATIENTS, SIBLINGS, SILLY, USA | HEALTHY | JUNE 19, 2018
(My family has always been accident-prone, especially my brother and me. When he gets married and they start having a family, I decide to warn my sister-in-law.)

Me: “Are you sure you want to do this? Just so you know, my brother has the Mother’s Curse. ‘May you have children like yourself so you know what it’s like.’”

Sister-In-Law: “Oh, it’s worse than that. I have the Mother’s Curse, too. So it’s doubled!

(Fast forward several years and four kids later. At a family gathering, my sister-in-law explains all of the times in the last year that her children have been in Urgent Care from accidental injuries.)

Sister: *referring to my experience after an injury that required repeated medical interventions* “Well, as long as the ER nurses don’t know you by name, I think you’re doing just fine.”

Sister-In-Law: “Well, they don’t know us by name, but they sort of recognize us now.”

(On a later date, my brother is joking with our father

Brother: “Last time we took a kid in, I told the intake nurse, ‘[Family Name], party of six. We have a reservation?’”

(And recently, after a particularly eventful month

Brother: “We have our own examination room!”

The Jaws Of Defeat
CANADA, HOSPITAL, IGNORING & INATTENTIVE, NURSES, ONTARIO | HEALTHY | JUNE 18, 2018
(I just had jaw surgery, so I am in the hospital for a few days with a swollen face, and my jaw is wired shut. I really can’t speak. I wake up in the middle of the night. My sister is sleeping in the guest chair, but I can feel the pain easing in on my face, so I decide to hail the nurse using a button on the side of the bed. Instead of the nurse coming to see what I need, she proceeds to use the speaker attachment. You can probably see where this is going.)

Nurse: “Hello, honey, what do you need?”

Me: “…”

Nurse: “What do you need?”

Me: *internal screaming*

(They did eventually come.)

This Patient Is Not A Breath Of Fresh Air
BIZARRE, CALIFORNIA, MEDICAL OFFICE, PATIENTS, USA | HEALTHY | JUNE 18, 2018
(I work at a large, multi-specialty medical office. Access to the back office is restricted, so patients are guided to their rooms by me or by another nurse after they check in. After their appointment, there are signs showing the patients the way out, but unsurprisingly, many ignore them and get lost. My coworker finds a woman wandering the halls.)

Coworker: “Were you looking for the exit? Let me show you the way.”

Woman: “No, I… I’m here to see the pulmonologist.”

(It turns out the woman had never actually checked in, and had just followed another patient into the back office when they were called back! My coworkers and I wondered if she thought she was just going to stumble upon the pulmonologist waiting for her in one of the rooms!)

Hopefully That’s The Exception And Not The Rule
HOSPITAL, PATIENTS, PENNSYLVANIA, REVOLTING, RUDE & RISQUE, STUPID, USA | HEALTHY | JUNE 18, 2018
(I work the night shift in an ER as a doctor.)

Me: “You say you have something stuck up your rectum?”

Patient: “Yep. It’s a flexible rubber ruler.”

Me: “How did it get there?”

Patient: “I intentionally put it there.”

(I’m little surprised, because usually in cases like this they try to make it seem like it happened by accident when it very obviously didn’t.)

Me: “Why did you put it there?”

Patient: “I wanted to see how far it goes. Apparently, it’s deeper than a foot.”

Me: “Okay… Well, we’ll see about having that removed.”

Patient: “Can I have it back when it’s out? My son needs it for school.”

(I feel really bad for that guy’s son.)

Coming Soon: The Not Always Right Store!
ANNOUNCEMENTS | FRIENDLY HEALTHY HOPELESS LEARNING LEGAL RELATED RIGHT ROMANTIC WORKING | JUNE 17, 2018
Hey readers!

Soooo the other day we accidentally posted an announcement for a secret project we have been working hard on for you: the Not Always Right Store!

As some of our witty readers commented, we were definitely not always right! We are still putting the finishing touches on the store and making sure everything is perfect for you.

In the meantime, we’d like to thank you for your patience and understanding.

Be sure to check back again when we have our grand opening of the Not Always Right Store on Monday, June 25, 2018.

We hope you are all just as excited as we are!

The Not Always Right Team

PS – If any of you happen to be the owner’s father’s brother’s nephew’s cousin’s former roommate, this makes us absolutely nothing! May the schwartz be with you!

Third-Degree Burns, First-Degree Idiot
FLORIDA, HEALTH & BODY, HOTEL, STUPID, USA | HEALTHY | JUNE 17, 2018
(I’m working the evening shift at a hotel with the owner one evening when a young couple, who checked in earlier, approaches the desk.)

Young Man: “Would it be possible to get a slice of cheesecake and some matches for a candle? We’re celebrating her birthday today.”

Me: “Sure thing, and happy birthday to you.”

(I prepare the cheesecake and grab some matches, and they then go to their room. About five minutes later, they come back with his arm wrapped in a shirt.)

Young Woman: “We need directions to the nearest hospital. He has burned his arm. There is also a little bit of smoke in the room, currently.”

(The owner gives them directions to the local hospital and sends me up to check on everything. When I get to the floor, I see some smoke in the hallway. Then, I open the door to find the room is barely visible due to there being so much smoke in the room. I go get the owner as the fire alarm starts to go off. Everyone evacuates the building and the fire department shows up as we are trying to clear all the smoke out.)

Me: “All this from one candle? What did they do, drop the cake?”

Owner: “Actually, it turns out the ‘candles’ they were using were actually sparklers. Not a good idea in a small room.”

(We found out later he had to be taken to a burn hospital and treated for third-degree burns.)

Might Have To Come Back Anyway For Stress
DELIVERY, HOSPITAL, IGNORING & INATTENTIVE, USA | HEALTHY | JUNE 16, 2018
(I work at the main information desk of a hospital. A fast-food delivery man comes inside with a bag of food.)

Delivery Man: “Is this the front desk?”

Me: “Yes, it is!”

Delivery Man: “Great. I’ve got an order for [Customer]. Their instructions said to meet them at the front desk, and they just got a text saying I’m here. I’m going to wait for them to come down, okay?”

Me: “That’s fine.”

(Several minutes go by. No one comes down. The delivery man begins to get irritated.)

Delivery Man: “You’re sure this is the front desk?”

Me: “Yes, sir. There are other desks in [departments], but this is the main, front information desk.”

Delivery Man: “Well, why isn’t [Customer] here?!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir. I don’t know. Do you know if they’re a patient or a visitor?”

(The delivery man is now on his phone and not paying attention to me.)

Delivery Man: “I just don’t understand! My instructions say to meet [Name] at the front desk of [Brand] Inn!”

Me: “I’m sorry, did you say the [Brand] Inn?”

Delivery Man: “Yeah.”

Me: “That’s a hotel.”

Delivery Man: “Yeah.”

Me: “This is a hospital.”

(He looks around, apparently noticing the “TO EMERGENCY ROOM” sign, the pharmacy, and the several rows of wheelchairs around my desk for the very first time.)

Delivery Man: “CRAP!”

(He runs out of the lobby, leaving the drinks from the meal behind. He returns about five minutes later, grabs them, and runs out without saying anything. About two hours later, he returns with another order.)

Delivery Man: *sheepishly* “I’m in the right place this time. I checked.”

Me: “That’s good!”

Delivery Man: “Is [Man] here?”

(I look around. There are no men in the lobby.)

Me: “Sorry, I guess not.”

Delivery Man: “What?! My instructions say [Man] is waiting in the Women and Infants Services lobby! He’s supposed to already be here!”

Me: “Well… The Women and Infants Services lobby is down that hallway to the right, actually. This is the front lobby—”

Delivery Man: “So I’m in the wrong spot again?”

Me: “Well, the wrong department—”

Delivery Man: “G**d*** it! I thought this job would be easy!”

(He stormed out of the lobby and stomped off to the correct department. At least this time he remembered his drinks!)

Don’t Even Start With Me
LABORATORY, STUPID, SWITZERLAND, TECH SUPPORT | HEALTHY | JUNE 15, 2018
(I work in IT for a medical laboratory, and part of my job is to troubleshoot connections between medical devices and our software. The medical devices themselves are not ours to manage, however. I get this call one morning

Lab Tech: “Hi, my machine is not working. Could you help me, please?”

Me: “Sure! What device, and what seems to be wrong?”

Lab Tech: “It’s [Device], and I don’t know; it’s just doing nothing.”

Me: “Okay, let me check.”

(I see nothing wrong with my monitoring. However, our connectors have a tendency to need regular reboots, as they’re quite old and tend to give us trouble, so I’m expecting it to be something wrong with our equipment.)

Me: “Can you please reboot the connector? The one behind your machine.”

Lab Tech: “Sure, give me a sec.”

(My monitoring starts showing its usual shutdown and boot-up messages.)

Me: “Okay, looks good. Can you try the device again?”

Lab Tech: “Nope, still nothing.”

(I try every trick in the book to get the device to work, including having her reboot the medical device itself, which is kind of a last solution, since they’re not ours to troubleshoot. Nothing ever seems wrong on my end, but the lab tech still says it’s not working. This goes on for FIVE HOURS! I’m way past desperation point, when I ask her to walk me through every step of her process to see where exactly it hangs.)

Lab Tech: “Well, I put my samples in the tray…” *pause*

Me: “Yes, and then?”

Lab Tech: “Well, that’s supposed to be it…” *pause* “Oh, wait… I didn’t press the start button.” *pause, then my monitoring starts flooding with orders* “Now it’s working.”

Me: *screaming internally but somehow managing to keep my cool* “Well, there you go. Have a nice day.” *hangs up*

Weak In The Knees
AUSTRALIA, DOCTOR/PHYSICIAN, MEDICAL OFFICE, PATIENTS, PERTH, WESTERN AUSTRALIA | HEALTHY | JUNE 14, 2018
(I have gone to my general practitioner to get a referral to a specialist for endometriosis. My regular GP is a middle-aged, Singaporean man, but I don’t mind having male doctors for female issues.)

Me: “I’m seeing [Specialist] for endometriosis, and I need a referral.”

GP: “You realise that you’ll have to have surgery to know for sure?”

Me: “Yes, I have a family history.”

GP: “Okay, I just have to make sure that you have a reason to go. Do you have painful periods?”

Me: “Yes, definitely.”

GP: “So, it hurts in your abdomen region? Is it cramping, or other pain?”

Me: “Actually, my knees hurt.”

GP: “Come again?”

Me: “I get pain from my knees up during my period. But it’s worst in my knees.”

GP: “Really?” *chuckles* “All right, just give me a minute to write that referral.”

(I honestly hadn’t realised how weird it was, before that. I did end up having endometriosis — it turned out the knee pain was nerve damage from that.)

In-Law Practices Out-Law Medicine
AUSTRALIA, BAD BEHAVIOR, HOME, IN-LAWS, NEW SOUTH WALES, SYDNEY | HEALTHY | JUNE 13, 2018
(My sister is a recent medicine graduate and is now a doctor. My mother-in-law finds out that she’s practicing.)

Mother-In-Law: “Oh, your sister is practicing now? So, that means she writes prescriptions?”

Me: “Well, yeah, I would think she does?”

Mother-In-Law: “Oh, you have to get her to write me a prescription for this ADHD medication that makes you lose weight like crazy!”

Me: “Well, you’re welcome to go and see her and ask for it, but I don’t think she’ll give it to you. Why would you want it, anyway?”

Mother-In-Law: “I want to lose a few kilos before summer this year.”

Me: “Well… No. I think that medication is for people whose weight is putting their health in danger.”

Mother-In-Law: “Can’t you just get her to write me one? I don’t want to go and see her.”

Me: “Um… No, I think that’s illegal.”

Mother-In-Law: “Well, then, can you get me a prescription for Xanax? I’m super stressed.”

Me: “No.”

An Ambulatory Emergency
HOSPITAL, JERK, PATIENTS, USA | HEALTHY | JUNE 12, 2018
(I’m working at the window as a tech in the ER. It’s three am, but pretty busy, and the wait times are very long because we only staff half a dozen nurses and only one doctor at this time. A very impatient woman with a headache comes up to the window several times demanding to know how much longer it will be. Being an ER and not an urgent clinic, we see patients based on how likely they are to die in the waiting room, and we have seen her twice in the last week for her headache, so she has to get in line behind ambulances with broken bones and heart attacks.)

Patient: “How much longer is it going to be?!”

Me: “I’m so sorry, ma’am. Unfortunately, we’ve been getting many ambulances with critical patients in tonight, so it’s going to be a while before you can be seen. We cannot give out exact wait times, as we never know what kind of emergencies we will receive in the interim.”

Patient: “Well, if I go outside and call an ambulance, will it get me seen sooner?”

Me: “Well, no… the charge nurse would have you sent right back here to the triage area. Then we would be calling the police. Calling an ambulance from outside an ER for a medical emergency is against the law and they could arrest you.”

(She walked away from the window in a huff and waited another hour to be seen for the headache she should have seen a primary doctor for after her first visit a week ago. Our doctor gave her no more pain medicine, just a referral identical to two others she had gotten in our ER.)

Taking A Knee To The Wallet
BILLING, DOCTOR/PHYSICIAN, HOSPITAL, NEW YORK, USA | HEALTHY | JUNE 11, 2018
(I work for a Spanish company in Madrid. The company’s CFO and I fly to New York for ten days for several business meetings. After arriving in New York, I trip and injure my knee. As we have the first business meeting that afternoon, I just bite through the pain, and go to the meeting. After the meeting, in conversation with my CFO

CFO: “[My Name], is your knee still hurting? You were awfully quiet the entire meeting.”

Me: “Yep, still hurts. I’ll put some ice on it when we get to the hotel after dinner to see if it helps.”

(The next morning my knee still hurts, and now it’s swollen. My CFO insists that I go to the hospital, and takes me to the emergency room. I am seen in less than half an hour by a doctor.)

Doctor: “So, what’s wrong?”

Me: “I tripped yesterday and hurt my knee. I had ice on it the entire evening, but it didn’t get better. It’s slightly swollen.”

Doctor: “All right, and does it hurt?”

Me: “Yes, it does.”

Doctor: “Okay. Let’s take an x-ray, and I’ll give you some medicine for the pain.”

(The x-ray is taken. I receive my medicine and wait for the doctor to come see me again.)

Doctor: “All right, it seems you did fall pretty bad. You did some serious damage to your knee, and will definitely need surgery, sooner rather than later. We can do it here if you’d like.”

(As my CFO is there with me, I quickly speak to him.)

Me: “[CFO], I have no idea how much this is going to cost. I can pay this x-ray; however, I’m not sure about the surgery and hospital stay.”

CFO: “[My Name], don’t worry. It happened on a business trip; the company will pay for everything.”

Me: “Thank you! [Doctor], I’d like to do the surgery, then.”

Doctor: “Okay, perfect. I cannot do it today, but wait in the waiting room and I’ll send someone to tell you when we will be available within the next few days.”

(We both go and sit in the waiting room and wait for almost one hour, before someone in a suit shows up.)

Billing Guy: “Hello, my name is [Billing Guy], and I am from the billing department. Since you are a foreign citizen and have no insurance, we need to go over the costs first. First of all, I expedited the billing of your ER visit, and the x-ray and medicine you had costs [amount slightly under $1,300], which you have to pay before we can even think about scheduling the surgery. The surgery itself will require you to stay in the hospital for a while, and will be significantly more expensive. We cannot tell you how much it will be, as it varies; however, if you want to play it on the safe side you can expect something between $25,000 and $30,000.”

CFO: *suddenly awake* “Okay, the $1,300 I can pay right now. The surgery should not be a problem, as well; however, I need to call HQ to let them know.”

Billing Guy: “Should? All right, I will have to speak to my boss. Leave me your contact details, go back to your hotel, and I will call you the latest tomorrow morning so we can work out the details.”

(Two days pass, with no word whatsoever. Suddenly, in the middle of our next meeting my CFO gets a call and excuses himself from the meeting. He’s gone for almost half an hour. When he comes back

CFO: “[My Name], they refused to do the surgery, as they couldn’t be sure we would pay. I told them we already paid the ER visit with no problems whatsoever, but it wasn’t enough for them. They said our company’s finance department could afterwards simply refuse to pay. I told him I was the CFO and would guarantee payment, but that wasn’t enough for them.”

Me: “Okay, I can work this way for another week, and I’ll just go to the hospital back in Madrid.”

CFO: “No, you can’t. I already called the airline; they changed both our flights. We fly back this evening, and [CEO] is on the phone with a doctor friend of his who works at [Public Hospital] to make sure they’re ready for you as soon as you arrive.”

Me: “And the meetings?”

CFO: “We’ll reschedule; don’t worry.”

(The next day we flew back home, and my wife met me at the airport and drove me to the hospital where they were waiting for me. They immediately took an x-ray, confirmed I indeed needed immediate surgery, and simply did it. Including fuel money, surgery, medicine, and hospital stay, it didn’t cost more than a lunch for two. I now appreciate our Public Health Care system; even though it sometimes is slow, it is either free or inexpensive. Kudos to you Americans for being able to live with that health care system of yours without insurance. I am not sure I would be able to do it.)

Looking For An Opening
ATLANTA, GEORGIA, IMPOSSIBLE DEMANDS, JERK, MEDICAL OFFICE, PATIENTS, USA | HEALTHY | JUNE 10, 2018
(I work for a doctor’s office that will work some Saturdays. However, on the Saturdays that we are open, only one doctor, the dermatologist, is there. The phones go straight to the answering service because we do not have the majority of the front office working. I am working phones this day. A patient calls in on February 4th.)

Patient: “Was [Doctor] working on January 23rd?”

Me: *after checking schedule* “Yes, ma’am, he was here that Saturday.”

Patient: “I tried to call and didn’t get an answer.”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, our phones are never open on Saturdays.”

Patient: “Why didn’t someone call to tell me he was open?!”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Patient: “There was a threat of snow!” *which didn’t happen* “No one called me and we—” *her and her two daughters* “—missed our appointments!”

Me: “We have a system in place where we call the patients if the office is closing due to inclement weather, but we remained open.”

Patient: “HALF OF ATLANTA WAS CLOSED; WHY DIDN’T YOU CALL?!”

Me: “Because we remained open, ma’am. Would you like to reschedule your appointments?”

Patient: “What are you going to do about this?”

Me: “I can reschedule your appointments, but there is not much else I can do.”

Patient: “You aren’t going to tell the doctor? Don’t you think he would want to know?”

(This eventually had to be transferred to my manager, who informed her the doctor was quite aware he remained open and even though “HALF OF ATLANTA” was apparently closed, the other half was not.)

A Bad Case Of Extreme Entitlement
BAD BEHAVIOR, BIGOTRY, MEDICAL OFFICE, OREGON, PATIENTS, USA | HEALTHY | JUNE 9, 2018
(I need a trip to the doctor, and the one I am seeing is brand new to me, so I don’t know much about the office. When my husband and I walk in, we are approached by a woman in a wheelchair.)

Patient #1 : “If you’re here to see the doctor, there’s a four-hour wait.”

Me: “Seriously?”

Patient #1 : “Yeah. It’s really bad. They’ve started using a new system today and they’re having all sorts of trouble with it.”

(A younger woman comes out to take the patient away.)

Husband: “Excuse me, but is it true that if you have an appointment, they’re running four hours behind?”

Young Woman: “Oh, no. That’s just the walk-in clinic. Appointments are running as close to on time as they can get.”

Me: “Thanks.”

(My husband and I go inside and approach the counter.)

Nurse #1 : “Hello there. Are you here for the clinic?”

Me: “No, I’ve got an appointment with [Doctor] at three.”

Nurse #1 : “All right, then. Let me get some information from you and we’ll get you going.”

(I give her all the pertinent information. She puts it all in, and then her computer beeps and she gives a deep sigh.)

Nurse #1 : “I’m sorry. I need to restart the computer, and I’ll have to get your info again. It’s this new system we got. Today is our first day using it and it’s been nothing but trouble.”

Me: “No problem. I understand computers acting up.”

Nurse #1 : “Thanks for your understanding.”

(Next to me is another patient trying to get in to see a doctor via the walk-in clinic.)

Patient #2 : “What do you mean there’s a four-hour wait? I’m sick. I could die. Why can’t you get me in sooner?”

Nurse #2 : “I’m sorry, ma’am. But we’re running behind because of the trouble with our new system. If you don’t want to wait, I can get you an appointment tomorrow morning with your doctor.”

Patient #2 : “I don’t have time for that. I’m here now and you will see me now.”

Nurse #2 : “I’m sorry, ma’am. You’re going to have to wait.”

Nurse #1 : “Okay, [My Name]. Let’s go over that information one more time.” *gives info* “Okay, it took it this time. Here you go. You should be called back shortly.”

Me: “Thank you.”

Patient #2 : “Why is she getting in before me? She’s fat. Fat people are always sick. They should have to wait.”

Nurse #2 : “She has an appointment with one of our doctors.”

Patient #2 : “Then give me her appointment.”

Nurse #2 : “We’re not going to do that. Either sit down or take the appointment I’m offering you.”

([Patient #2 ] continued screaming that “fat people are too sick to see a doctor,” and “I’m more important than everyone here.” She was removed from the office and banned from the clinic.)